"Well, you're the trouble I was looking for"

Quite nonchalantly, I find myself blogging twice in a day! Giving you a slight indication of what I do with my time at the moment. But I can't help but share this video of probably one of my favourite musicians of all time (most of the rest are unfortunately dead).

I love how he earnestly reminisces and describes how the music industry was like, before the Internet and dotcoms and tweets, how it was like being a musician back then. Especially when he talks about just having a voice through the Internet, no matter the reach.

I never thought I would actually be able to relate or identify with some of the things they say (no I'm no big muso but you're welcome to mistake me for one lol) in these interviews, but just having the amazing pleasure of playing in a band and being invited to play at cool, paid, acoustic gigs is a sufficient taste (albeit at the lowest fraction) of what musicians go through for huggee performances, and arena venues.

Being the worrier that I am, I constantly worry about being good enough, warranting that kind of attention, and being frankly, quite embarrassed of just saying, 'come watch me play!' just in case everything didn't turn out just as well.

We'd practice and I'd make sure to practice (while freaking out) till I could drown out the pressure of just merely performing, and sometimes I would forget all the fun and my genuine love for singing because now there was an audience and an expectation (not just my shower head and bathroom tiles), despite the fact that most of the audience were made up of friends who would love and support us and come to watch us again and again unconditionally.

At the end of the day, I think we all wish we could fall into things that we love to do for a living just by doing them and not worrying about impacts, the future or where our next meal is coming from.

It's a great big world out there, with a whole lot of noise, and I think it's having to rely on recognition and the volume of your 'voice' to get to where you want that gets to me sometimes.

My motivation is to discard of goals, aspirations and concerns about where I would like to be, and just focus on where I am, and what I would like to do now, and to make sure that today doesn't go to waste.